Thursday, January 24, 2013

Uptown And The Angry Inch

You've probably heard about the national "scandal" in which Subway Foot-Long Subs are coming up short by an inch or more.  Customers are pulling out tape measures, lawyers are licking their chops, and dozens of lawsuits have been filed.  So why should Uptown be left out of the litigation action?

Plaintiff Nguyen Buren has filed a class action suit claiming that the sandwich he bought from the Subway in the strip mall at Clark and Montrose didn't measure up.  How much does the suit ask for in damages for that missing inch?

Five million bucks.

Read more at the Sun-Times and at CBS Chicago.


  1. Give it a break --anyway to make a buck.Buisenesses have it hard enough right now to stay a float.So you ate 1 less inch of a sandwich.

  2. Some people play the lottery.

    Some people work hard for their money.

    Some people live off "the system".

    Some people stand on the corner with a cup.

    Some people look for any opportunity to abuse the justice system and make a fortune.

  3. And some people misrepresent products they are selling. There is a little something called truth in advertising, Tony. If you advertise a footlong sandwich and are charging people for a footlong sandwich, your product should be a footlong sandwich. Pretty simple stuff. On a similar scale, would it be ok for your cable company to advertise your service to provide 100 channels, charge you for 100 channels, but only give you 90? Yeah, probably not, huh? Can your kid's daycare say they will watch the kid 5 days a week, charge you for 5 days a week but only let the kid in Monday-Thursday? Yeah, didn't think that would be cool either. If you buy a CTA pass with unlimited rides for $86 and they only allow you 20 rides in a month, you're going to complain, aren't you? That's what I thought. Not sure why anyone thinks Sunway should be exempt from these rules we all play by.

  4. Maybe the bread starts off at 12 inches and just gets a little shrinkage issue when the very chilly lettuce hits it---it happens, am I right, gentlemen?

    Maybe Subway is just trying to fight the good fight of obesity in America, one inch at a time?

    Maybe people who actually take the time to measure their friggin sandwiches should find something more productive to do..

  5. From

    (fʊt'lông', -lŏng') pronunciation
    Being about one foot in length: i.e. a footlong hot dog.

    The term is a generalization within the food industry just as a 2x4 isn't actually 2in by 4in. in the lumber industry. This suit will get tossed faster than you can say "frivolous".

  6. The jokes just write themselves here.

    I hope that we don't live in a world where lawsuits and criminal charges are commonly brought over the mere difference of an inch or three.

    There would be a whole lot of guys facing jail time or having their wages garnished. There's another joke in there, but I ain'tagonnamakeit.

  7. There was a story on the news this morning. Subways were measured around NYC, and they mostly ALL measured 12 inches. Some were over, some were a little under. "Footlong" is a generalization. NOT false advertising. Baking bread is not a science, it is an art. No two loaves are exactly the same. "Footlong" is close enough unless you are a fat slob that is worried about that extra inch or a greedy pig hungry for someone to sue.

  8. I've never thought of anything coming out a Subway sandwich shop as 'art.' Having said that though, I'd have to agree with justrow, IP and tony. I do understand this to be an issue if sandwiches were sold be weight or length, but they're not. I'd even throw the guy a nod if he worked out how much he had been overcharged for that missing inch or so over the years (like fine, here's 45 bucks back). But 5 million? Helllllllllllooooo 'merica!

    In related news.

  9. While the suit sounds a little ridiculous to me, to be fair to the Plaintiff, I don't think he is seeking $5 million for himself, but for all the individuals across the country who have been "damaged."

  10. This is not going anywhere in court. They are just trying to force a settlement to avoid bad PR.

  11. Chilly lettuce = Shrinkage?

    They never said it had to be a footlong of bread--Subway should just hang the cheese half an inch out on either side--problem solved.

  12. Irish Pirate, you did make the joke.

  13. Scott,

    I did?

    Well I guess I'd better get my wages garnished, huh?

  14. Does this guy have nothing better to do with his life? I'm a carpenter and I use a product to glue wood together called carpenters mate, shall I sue because it doesn't come for a drink on a Friday or text me every now and then!!! Get over yourself and get back to your work, prick!